Love and What It Means
By Akilia, age 13, Oklahoma
Love. We tend to use it a lot with boyfriends nowadays, but what does it really mean to love? Love isn't a normal word for us, ladies, and you know it. Most of our hearts have been broken because of it.
A couple of weeks ago my boyfriend actually said he loved me first, and when that happens you always think, Wow, I've found Mister Right. But then I asked him, "How do you know you love me?" His answer was this: "You're beautiful, amazing, sexy, smart, and I don't think I could live without you." After that was said, I then asked him the most important question of our relationship: "Babe, when is my birthday?" As usual, that ended it all. Love isn't a word we should use lightly. I'm not trying to say this to be like your moms; I'm saying it because we all can do way better.
Most of you have boyfriends. Am I right, or am I right? He's told you that he loves you, and not even thirty minutes pass by without him asking for one thing that you really aren't ready for. That's another 'mom thing' that I try not to stress on. Sex is basically what all 7th to 12th grade guys look at us for. You're all very smart to just say no to sex, ladies. Here's a way to tell how a guy is about to ask you if you'll do it - it's happened many times to me before, and probably to you too. He'll say: "Baby, you know we're meant 'to be', right? We can do this. I promise it won't hurt, and I'll even stop when you tell me to." Ever heard this? I'm not saying you should listen to me. I'm just saying, listen to your options before you go off and do something that will hurt you later on in life.
Loving ourselves has to be the number one priority for us. It's part of the reason we do what we do. You should love the way you look, the way you act, smile, breathe, talk ... You're different for a reason; no one needs to be you but you. Live your life to the fullest by loving yourself for who you truthfully are, not based on what guys say or how they treat you.
Most of you will have at least 50 guy friends tell you they love you before you turn 19. They'll actually mean it - your current boyfriend maybe not so much. Make sure that you've known him a while, or that he can at least remember your b-day, before you decide to say that you love him.
Ladies, let's also make sure we know our guys too. I have an older brother who has been hurt so many different times that he doesn't want to date anyone ever again. (But now he's falling for someone new.)
Remember not to use the word love lightly with guys. If we say it too much bad things could happen, or worse, you could get hurt. Here's a way not to wear your heart on your sleeve: Do not say you love someone the first day that you start dating them. Make sure you know them, and last but not least, don't act stupid when it does come to love.
